Cliché as it may sound, you never changed
a bit. You really are great. You are the perfect combination of a nice guy.
Fairly, I thought the second chances we had; was to give my heart a chance to
feel again. But, destiny is ironic – it always gives us things we look for at
the moment we least expect it. I could spend the whole day with you; or go on
dates after dates; dinners, movies, parks; but one thing is for sure, I felt
like spending time with someone is like a chore and it’s suffocating.
It’s
not you, my heart still battles when it comes to feelings. I knew it because
you’re not the only person who is trying to win my heart here. And I can’t even
be bothered to give any chances to anyone. You were the closest I open up to,
yet another cliché, I am still enjoying
the state of me being alone.
I don’t have the obligation to send
anyone text messages almost every hour, every day. I’m living a drama-free life
for once after a long time. I am enjoying my state of stability. The feeling of
relying on myself in every aspect makes me feel good, and I want to stay this
way for a while, maybe for a long time. I don’t enjoy your company; in fact, I
don’t enjoy company. It is not because you are not lovable, I AM. It’s not because I am still
entangled in the past, ‘cause the ship has sailed long ago before I even board
on. It has been almost five years now, and I’ve healed from the previous
relationship, I’ve gone out on several dates, but I guess I am just destined to
be alone for the rest of my lives.
I don’t want to be selfish by not reciprocating
your love. And for now, I just can’t make you a priority right now.