If there is a movie scene playing in my head right now, it would be the
short film by JinnyBoy starring Fabian Loo and Koe Yeet. Koe Yeet has taught Fabian
what it is like to chatting with dates online and little did it happen that
life wants them to be together in the end.
Yet to me, I could swipe and chat throughout the years, I’ve never put
myself in the shoe to be ready in a relationship. Because to me, the only thing scarier than getting it
wrong, is getting it so right I suddenly have something to lose. I’ve
always not been the one that makes the first move and denying my feelings so I
could excuse myself for falling in love.
I’m unsure myself if I could give you my best and love you the way
others haven’t. I can’t show you that you deserved the best or that I could
love you like you deserved. I am not sure if I could be the right person and I
know you feel the exact same way. You wonder who has been behind this crazy
chaotic text messages because it just seems like you’re falling for it but you’re
freaking out at the same time. At the meantime, you really want to know where
the story is heading.
Because if I could talk about feelings so openly, I would tell you that this is how I am feeling! Maybe that’s a
reflection of what I am seeing. And as far as our story goes, I would like to
see if our endings would be like the short film. I want to know if I could still love with all my broken pieces. I
want to know for once where the story would leads to without either of the
party walking away. Even though I break hearts more than glasses, I don’t have
any intention of hurting anyone. I don’t
have intentions of backing out, I just
want to feel right for once.
But if you withdraw from the story, I’ll start with thank you. Thank you
for teaching me this heart of mine still has the ability to beat again even if
it’s a little broken.