We survived heartaches. There were nights when I would wake up with an ache on my chest over a
memory that reminded me in my sleep, but here I am, still standing and telling
stories about my life. There were moments when I felt like I would never
experience happiness again after I was broken into pieces, but I learned to put
myself back together and learn to smile and laugh again, maybe not quite for
love. I might never be whole again, but I’m getting there.
We survived loss. Life is a lot more harsh that I expected; where you get backstabbed,
lose family members that I thought would be on this earth forever but left too
soon. Even though I miss them on family reunions, I am okay on most days. I
wouldn’t say my heart is strong enough to handle loss, but it’s been coping
well and it’s still strong enough to beat inside my chest.
We survived rejection. There are projects that I didn’t achieved and investment I’ve made the
wrong judgment. There were people who made me think I’m not good enough but
there are also people who encouraged me to pursue my dreams, who supported
every decisions I made even though most of them are ridiculous! I survived those insecurities, even though I
may not have conquered them quite yet.
We survived all of my worst moments. I survived awkward conversations, toxic
relationships, physical and emotional pain. I survived the worst things that
have ever happened to me – and I didn’t give myself nearly enough credit for
the strength that I given myself. It might be inaccurate to say that the
greatest thing I’ve survived over the past decade was survive, but that is how I felt right now. A burden of
responsibility over my shoulder yet felt like I had achieved nothing.
I kept giving myself a pat over my
shoulder for being able to survive another decade, and not any decade, a decade of adulthood! I should be proud
of myself for that. And I could tell my younger self that we’ve got 10 years of
adulthood experience, the next decade wouldn’t be as hard (hopefully)!