I woke up in the middle of the night starring out to the night sky with stars filling up the dark, I thought about whether I want to let myself open to love again or that I want to just pack my bags and just continue my life before the pandemic on traveling the world in business class. I’m a little happier in life now. Something in me is opening, changing, but that doesn’t mean I am okay with the idea of love. I no longer think I need to wrap myself in a pink ribbon, make myself pretty.
It took me a long time since I ended
my relationship to find back myself. To be able to look myself into the mirror
again without crumbling down to the floor. It took me a long time to fall in
love with people, cities, new places and myself. I’d not been myself for a long
time and no one realizes that. One night I found my broken pieces lying
in the basement of my abandoned heart. It took me a long time to convince it to
walk into the light with me.
It’s July and even though it is summer
but tomorrow there will be thunderstorm. It’s okay, the storm has been inside
of me all along. I thought I find peace in moment like this, I want to get lost
in it all, to ache, to love, to find myself all over again. And to find
happiness all over again.
