You
brought out a side of me I didn’t know still existed because I barricaded it so
far down. I like to think I’m mask underneath a perfectly cheerful version of
me, but it’s only a part of my heart. I wear the part that shows the world I
have a heart, the part that cares about humanity and the well being of other
humans, the part that cares about the future generations, and to believe the
importance of nurturing, guiding, and raising them through a safe environment.
Yet,
the part I have hid so well, the part I didn’t know I still have it in me is
the side you uncovered. I’ve hidden my heart from love; I always had after
it was broken. I have kept the broken pieces in the basement of my abandoned
heart, no one lives there now. Not even I. I have abandoned it for so long that
I didn’t even know myself, I shied away from relationships, from connections,
from anything deep because I thought I couldn’t feel.
Then
you came along, you stripped the shield and respected the distance I needed to
keep me comfortable. You made me feel things I couldn’t remember for a long
time; you reminded me what it’s like to have someone in the heart all the time.
You remind me how to miss someone who is still in front of me. I didn’t
know I could look into someone’s eyes all over again and not have the world
trembles. I didn’t know I was capable of letting that emotion in my life
because for so long I swore it off.
It’s
been long since I felt fireworks in me, to get butterflies in my stomach when I
know I am going to meet you. You make me want to do things I usually cringe at.
I question myself about my life’s plan, but oh, my heart just melts every day knowing
you’re the first thing and last thing on my mind. To be honest, I’m afraid of
what’s unfolding in front of me, but I’m going in anyway.