I
woke up with a bad dream today, where I reached out to my phone, there you were
already wishing me a Good Morning with a heart. I wish so badly that I could
cuddle up to you so that you could calm my soul and whisper by my ear that it
was just a bad dream. But I felt the excitement in your message, I did not
have the heart to put off that fire that is igniting in you, so I swallowed
that thought and replaced the message that matches your vibe.
I
put on my logical mind and interpreted that dream. It explains in a way that
it’s just my anxiety eating up on me, ohhh, it’s just some old demon in action
I thought. Maybe a hot shower will wash it all away, I’ve made it through
all the fight with my demons, there is no exception for this one. I
gather all my energy to leave the room, to socialize and put on that smile. I
thought about him, and my heart smiled; I guess you must be stronger than my
demons.
Anxiety
is the demon living inside of me; things I had to battle every now and then. It’s
such a confusing and strong emotion, I just hope that it doesn’t take over my
head and make me anxious about things that don’t exist. I convince myself to
speak about feelings, that I ain’t a burden for feeling too much. But I know
all those words will always fail to get out of my lips, that there is always
going to be a graveyard in my mouth filled with words that have died on my
lips.
I
would just look into you and hoped that you would hold me until my broken
pieces come together. I need you, I need you to stay even if I make it hard. I
need you to stay, even when I can’t mumble those three little words. I never
wanted anyone, but I need you.