Being
with you is like a sudden calm from the chaos that has been swirling around me
for a long time. I can still hear the thunderstorm outside my door, I am still surrounded
by the demons I have befriended for a long time. Yet every night I wonder what
you’re made of, you’re able to brace through the thunderstorm and find your way
into my heart, you do not even have to fight the demons who have continuously exhausted
me, hollow me out and let me feel like I was hard to love. You’re
like the fire that’s missing from me.
All
my life, I never felt that I needed to be in someone’s arms to feel safe, I
never knew that being close to a human being could give me a sudden calm. And for
a very long time I have felt peace inside of my battling heart. He walks into my
heart like he had the keys to my padlock heart. There is no fumbling through the
pockets trying to find the right way in. There is no desperately reaching into the
bag trying to uncover the point of access. He walks over softly, with a relief
that washes over me.
Each
time he held on to me it just felt like an earthquake is shaking inside of me,
and I think if he hugs me long enough the little girl that has been hiding
inside the dark would just burst into tears. But when is a monster not a
monster? Oh, when you love it. As long as you hold my heart, I can
conquer the demons, climb the highest mountains and swim through the deepest
ocean.