What
a girl wants on Valentine isn’t the gifts, but the little thoughts and actions
behind it.
Getting
what we want is learning how to love ourselves, but a gift from you is a blessed
sign we feel from being loved.
For
the past decade, I had been the girl who went on dates after dates, turning
down one guy after another when they tried to label the friendship. I was the
woman who dream about a shoulder to lay on every night but never letting anyone
close to me. I’ve spent a huge part of my life going back and forth about
whether I should put myself in a relationship, because I always knew life is so
much more than finding that special someone.
I also
never allowed anyone to spend the holidays with me, especially on Valentine’s
Day and Birthdays. I always believe that these are very special days to me and
only reserve for those that could truly deserve my heart. Yet I curse too much
each time when I allow him to break my heart each time. I thought I vowed to
never grow attached to someone, to let them hurt me over and again. Every time
I just wish that a miracle could magically appear upon him that he would pay
more attention, to plan the dates just like before.
I
want a boyfriend who cares. Not someone who claims he cares and wants to date
you only to ask you over and again “What to do? Where to go?”. Not
someone who talks about how much he misses me but it’s always on the phone
scrolling on social media when you date. Not someone who says he wants to know
all about you but overcut to his when you’re in the mid of your stories. I want
a boyfriend who cares about spending time with me, who cares about what I’m
thinking and feeling, who listens to my side of the story. Who smiles when he
sees me smiling.
“I
can afford to buy anything for myself, but I still hope to receive your gift.
Just like I can be single, but I still want you to love me.”